The Hellhole

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

For several days now, my printer's been acting up. Not surprising, the warranty was up in February. I seem cursed when it comes to printers, although I can keep other equipment for eons. The monitor I bought in 1994 still works and is in use by a co-worker as I type (I graduated to a flat-screen in late 2004). So last week my printer started doing this trick where, when I send a print job, it will do its start-up click/bang/clunk but then the display says "processing job" forever. No matter how long I wait, 2 minutes or 2 hours, nothing further happens until I unplug it and recycle the power. Then it prints 3 - 5 jobs, depending on its mood, and decides to try the forever processing thing again.

This just happened moments ago only this time, after a couple of power-cyclings the display decides to read "paper jam" so I open the lid. Although there was no accompanying "boom", apparently the blue ink pump has EXPLODED. What appears to be an entire cyan cartridge is oozing everywhere inside. Ick. How do these things happen to me?!? I didn't DO anything to it; I just stick paper in and try to print stuff. It's not like I tried to run a t-shirt or a burrito through it for kicks&giggles. Why, WHY, WHY?!? But wait there's more.

A page of the boss's checks is stuck halfway through, so I turn it around to undo the cover over the rear paper feed and pull them out that way (that way offers no resistance if the paper jams). You can see where this is going, right? The checks pull out no problem, only the top check is SATURATED with blue ink. As the last edge of paper is freed, it slings ink upward in a blue arc. There is ink on the wall. There is ink on my sweater, on my hands, in my hair, all up one side of my FACE - I look like a halfbreed smurf. I swear, I don't know whether to laugh or cry.



  • Only you would have this happen - that is, unless I were doing it - then the same thing or worse would occur. Might as well laugh about it; tears would probably just set the blue into your hair and clothes.

    PSB! momma loves you!


    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:23 PM  

  • I have the same damn printer. I bought a laser printer from HP back in 1996 or so. Since I hadn't managed to kill it, and since I like the convenience of post-script, I decided to buy the color one (like you have).

    It's never worked as well as I thought it should. I'll spare you the list.

    But, the important point is that the last thing it did is to have the magenta ink cartridge come OPEN. There was magenta ink all over the ink compartment. Apparently, part of the computer's brains are under the compartment, too, because now it has started having unexpected errors, though not the same ones you are having.

    Right now, it's on my dining room table. I'm trying to decide what to do with it. I paid way too much for it and I'm mad that it isn't lasting like the 6p.


    :-) L

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:40 AM  

  • Quit copying me, Lachele! Like me, you're Southern but hate sweet tea. You have the same dog as I do. You wear boots like mine (I know, I sent you the link). Like mine, your life often bears strong resemblance to a Tom Robbins novel. You have the same printer as I do. Now you've had the same ink explosion. Using magenta instead of cyan don't excuse NUFFIN'. :-)

    By Blogger Helly, at 9:16 AM  

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