Yesterday I played so much Guitar Hero III that I actually caused a muscle ache in my forearm. It hurt so much I put liniment on it. It feels better today but I'm afraid to play more, even though I want to. "I have Gamer's Elbow!" I reported to Alan.

"'Gamer's Elbow'?"

"Yes. That's like tennis elbow, but geekier."

I am playing through the entire set list of GH3 on an easier setting, even though it's not very challenging, but if I 5-star every song on this setting I can unlock the BAT GUITAR. I want the bat guitar. At one point yesterday I was about 3/4 of the way through when an encore came up, and with encores you don't know what the song will be until the title flashes up on screen. I was horrified to see "Even Flow by Pearl Jam" appear. I hate, loathe, despise, abominate and abhor Pearl Jam. If you do, that's great - good on you, that's why Baskin Robbins makes 31 flavours, but I don't and that's not likely to change so don't bother sending me hate mail.

I looked over at the other end of the couch to find Alan smirking at me, highly amused to see which would win: my loathing for Pearl Jam or my desire for the bat guitar. Silly boy, as if I would be defeated by a mere video game - or a lame-ass band from Seattle. I paused the game, turned off the surround-sound, and proceeded to 5-star the song on the first play through, with no sound whatsoever - only the button color cues. HA! Ha-HA, I say!