Skanky Neighbor Update!
Now with photos!

I have an update on my skanky neighbors. Early Friday morning, as we were getting ready for work, we heard all sorts of major banging and loud mechanical noises, so we peeked around for the source. The company who'd supplied my skanky neighbors with a dumpster about a month ago were here, emptying and reclaiming their property. This dumpster, or rather the skanky family's relationship to it, had been puzzling me for some time.

I could understand if one couldn't afford a dumpster or if one had to do home improvements piecemeal, as time and money allowed. But I can't for the life of me understand why they paid to get this dumpster delivered and never put a single iota of refuse into it, or why they bustle about on rare occasions apparently doing work on the home and grounds, yet none of the crap, trash or bracken ever disappears - it just moves from place to place. While I am inherently extremely lazy, and wouldn't want to be outside cleaning up the grounds and, gods forbid, sweating, I would be far too parsimonious to pay for the thing and never avail myself of it. Paying for the waste receptacle would be a strong motivator.

As I angle my car to turn from my driveway into my garage each day, this puts me in a position such that I am looking straight into the area occupied by the dumpster. I didn't think I'd ever seen anything in it and it certainly wasn't overflowing, no boards or furniture or anything sticking over the edges. My suspicion was confirmed when the dumpster company dumped it: there was not one speck of trash inside.

But wait there's more.

It's not that they just left the refuse strewn all over - no, they worked to gather at least some of it up. They bagged stuff up in heavy duty trash bags, they hauled the bags over near the dumpster...and left them there. The sheer lack of logic boggles the mind. If they were too lazy to bother, okay, but they did some cleanup and got the bags to within inches of the danged dumpster that they were paying for! Pardon my language, but some things just call for a "What. The. Fuck." So, what the fuck?!?

At this juncture you might be thinking, if not that I made this up, at least I am embellishing events because why would a rational human behave in this manner? If that's what you're thinking, BEHOLD! And behold the Something-Even-Stranger illustrated in my photograph.
On the left you can see lots of black trash bags piled up, besides that one fuller one. I have no idea what's in them, but something must be or they'd have blown away. As you're looking at the photograph, the dumpster was positioned just to the right of those trash bags, on the concrete driveway.

And yes, yes indeedy, the skanky neighbors have in fact hung a garbage bag from their lamppost. A garbage bag that I conclude must contain something, because there's a kind of shape to it and it is obvious from the way it's hanging that it's not empty. The dumpster was sitting directly beside that lamppost. So someone took that bag, put some trash in it, walked it all the way from whereever they were outside, over to the dumpster, and instead of flinging it inside, chose instead to hang it upon a decorative lamppost. Why, Lord? Tell me why.