It's the little differences...
I called my friend Cheryl (my twin sister from a different mother) tonight to check on her, because she's been sick. Er, that is, sicker than usual. Physically, not just in the head. So she didn't answer and I left a message and she called me back once the movie that she'd been watching was finished.
Cheryl: I was watching "A Man Apart" with Vin Diesel.
Me: I've never heard of it - what's it about?
Cheryl: [explains plot briefly] - and it's VIN DIESEL, what else do you need to know?
Me: Oh, you're into him?
Cheryl: He is teh hotness. I want to nibble on that lower lip. And on...other things. Many. Other. Things. [waxes poetic upon the musculature and fineness of Vin Diesel]
Me: Have you seen "Pitch Black"? I haven't, but Bo recommends it.
Cheryl: Oh, I've seen "Pitch Black". Have I ever. And "Chronicles of Riddick" and "The Fast and The Furious" and "The Pacifier" and "Saving Private Ryan" and "Boiler Room" and...isn't he delicious? Don't you just want to...do things I don't want to talk about to YOU, but oh gods, those LIPS! Those shoulders! Those ABS!
Me: Uh...well, I saw this one movie he was in...
Cheryl: Which one???
Me: Um...I'm not really sure...
Cheryl: [describes 6 - 8 plots of Vin Diesel movies, including co-stars, locations, etc.]
Me: Um...it was the one where he drove the greenish-black GTO!
Cheryl: [disgusted] That was Triple-X.
Me: Oh, yeah, that sounds right. Damn, that was a bitchin' GTO! A '67, I'm pretty sure.
Cheryl: So, lemme get this straight. You watched a killer action flick with VIN DIESEL, and Asia Argento who's hot even if you aren't a lesbian, and you remember nothing of this movie or those people or the plot, but you know what kind of muscle car he drove.
Me: Yeah. It looked black but I think it was black-over-green, '67, 325, V8 - though actually all GTOs were V-8s, yeah, not as much displacement as the '65 389, but--
Cheryl: [heavy sigh] Oh my gods. That's so - YOU. That's so totally YOU. Tell me, at any point during the entire two hours of this movie, did you by any chance happen to notice the supremely gorgeous, totally sculpted hot-as-hell hunk o'man-flesh ATTACHED to this GTO???
Me: Well...um...but...it was a THREE TWENTY-FIVE with the twin vertical headlights and the Rochester tri-power carburetors--
Cheryl: Where did I go wrong?!? WHERE?!? WHERE?!?
I called my friend Cheryl (my twin sister from a different mother) tonight to check on her, because she's been sick. Er, that is, sicker than usual. Physically, not just in the head. So she didn't answer and I left a message and she called me back once the movie that she'd been watching was finished.
Cheryl: I was watching "A Man Apart" with Vin Diesel.
Me: I've never heard of it - what's it about?
Cheryl: [explains plot briefly] - and it's VIN DIESEL, what else do you need to know?
Me: Oh, you're into him?
Cheryl: He is teh hotness. I want to nibble on that lower lip. And on...other things. Many. Other. Things. [waxes poetic upon the musculature and fineness of Vin Diesel]
Me: Have you seen "Pitch Black"? I haven't, but Bo recommends it.
Cheryl: Oh, I've seen "Pitch Black". Have I ever. And "Chronicles of Riddick" and "The Fast and The Furious" and "The Pacifier" and "Saving Private Ryan" and "Boiler Room" and...isn't he delicious? Don't you just want to...do things I don't want to talk about to YOU, but oh gods, those LIPS! Those shoulders! Those ABS!
Me: Uh...well, I saw this one movie he was in...
Cheryl: Which one???
Me: Um...I'm not really sure...
Cheryl: [describes 6 - 8 plots of Vin Diesel movies, including co-stars, locations, etc.]
Me: Um...it was the one where he drove the greenish-black GTO!
Cheryl: [disgusted] That was Triple-X.
Me: Oh, yeah, that sounds right. Damn, that was a bitchin' GTO! A '67, I'm pretty sure.
Cheryl: So, lemme get this straight. You watched a killer action flick with VIN DIESEL, and Asia Argento who's hot even if you aren't a lesbian, and you remember nothing of this movie or those people or the plot, but you know what kind of muscle car he drove.
Me: Yeah. It looked black but I think it was black-over-green, '67, 325, V8 - though actually all GTOs were V-8s, yeah, not as much displacement as the '65 389, but--
Cheryl: [heavy sigh] Oh my gods. That's so - YOU. That's so totally YOU. Tell me, at any point during the entire two hours of this movie, did you by any chance happen to notice the supremely gorgeous, totally sculpted hot-as-hell hunk o'man-flesh ATTACHED to this GTO???
Me: Well...um...but...it was a THREE TWENTY-FIVE with the twin vertical headlights and the Rochester tri-power carburetors--
Cheryl: Where did I go wrong?!? WHERE?!? WHERE?!?
5 Comments:
There's great speculation by men regarding What Women Really Discuss On The Phone. I'm not sure this helps.
I thought Vin Diesel was a brand of trousers.
By
oldhall, at 1:55 AM
You *really* don't wanna know what we talk about when we go to the bathroom in pairs. Trust me on this one.
By
Helly, at 9:46 AM
And I take it Cheryl's feeling better? :-)
By
Anonymous, at 8:50 PM
Oh, anonymous is me. Sorry.
By
Anonymous Me, at 8:51 PM
HEE HEE. Remember when all your friends were RAVING about this movie with Patrick Swayze, and we watched 'Roadhouse' to see Sam Elliott, and never even realized it was the same flick????
Just depends on your priorities, right, babe?
(her daddy's girl...yessir!)
mom
By
Anonymous, at 10:44 AM
Post a Comment
<< Home