The Hellhole

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

I came in an hour late today because I had to stay home to meet the security system repairman. That system is making me angry. It’s required repair four times in the last year and it’s only fifteen years old. You’d think they’d build these things to last.

This time, Zone Four kept showing a breach although no windows were open, so it couldn’t be armed but after a couple of days that didn’t matter because both keypads went dead. I let it stay broken for a couple of weeks, partly out of disgust and partly because with Thanksgiving and month-end coming up, I didn’t have time to spare to stay home from work and deal with it. Happily, it didn’t take that long to fix even though there were three separate problems. There were blown fuses, a wiring difficulty and a blown resistor (doubtless sabotage by THE RESISTY! I should have known.).

My vicious guard dog, Sprocket the Pit Shih-Tzu, was incensed by Jason the Repair Guy’s presence and made many loud barks. He was frustrated that I wouldn’t let him off the leash, the better to rend Jason’s limbs from his body. At one point Jason had to walk past me to the alarm keypad in the kitchen. Sprocket got between him and me, and growled this low, vicious "I'm about to tear you to shreds" growl meant to intimidate and frighten - like he's not the size of a FOOTBALL. A fuzzy football, at that.

I gave him a biscuit in hopes of stopping the noise but he held it in his mouth and growled around it. Finally I decided to store him in the laundry room, which I didn’t do earlier because he dislikes being imprisoned when there are repairmen to dismember, so he tries to claw his way out. He’s about 1/3 of the way through that particular door. After turning some more of it to splinters, he decided that wasn’t working fast enough so he began to fling his little body at the door like a furry battering ram.

He was extremely disappointed upon being released only to find that his quarry had escaped to the next service call. He was moderately assuaged by being given two more biscuits but I’ll just warn any of you who might drop by The Hellhole - the beast is thirsty for a kill.

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