Beware, all! Important warning of impending doom, and the proof is in my blog!
A few moments ago, I was desultorily checking CNN’s web page instead of attending to the very important stuff I get paid for doing, and I found an interesting and timely news item. I know - what are the odds? Anyway, it appears that Duran Duran showed up on Good Morning America last week to promote their new album. They have been touring for the last three years (who knew?) and have just released a "potent, moody album that showcases a newfound comfort in voicing powerful opinions." While that alone is an indication of evil in the universe, it was not until I got to the paragraph in which the author lauds John Taylor’s "flirty eyes" that I realized there might be more sinister implications. I headed over to my favorite web site, GameFAQs, logged in and sure enough, I was confronted with this message: "You are currently logged in as sennababe. There are approximately 2666 registered users currently using the message boards."
This can only mean one thing: Satan’s back! This is obviously the malefic manifestation of evil incarnate! And I should know - a while back, I got to do an exclusive interview with the prince of darkness (see 07/08/04). But wait - there’s more! Satan’s pitchfork has been found in Dusseldorf! I am only partially comforted by learning that Jesus has been sighted too, in San Diego, California. Although Jesus was able to save a Geo Metro from the clutches of Lucifer, I am fairly certain that Armageddon is upon us. After all, when a new Duran Duran album comes out, can Hüsker Dü be far behind? Remember, umlauts are Satan’s punctuation!
MONTOYA DELENDA EST!
A few moments ago, I was desultorily checking CNN’s web page instead of attending to the very important stuff I get paid for doing, and I found an interesting and timely news item. I know - what are the odds? Anyway, it appears that Duran Duran showed up on Good Morning America last week to promote their new album. They have been touring for the last three years (who knew?) and have just released a "potent, moody album that showcases a newfound comfort in voicing powerful opinions." While that alone is an indication of evil in the universe, it was not until I got to the paragraph in which the author lauds John Taylor’s "flirty eyes" that I realized there might be more sinister implications. I headed over to my favorite web site, GameFAQs, logged in and sure enough, I was confronted with this message: "You are currently logged in as sennababe. There are approximately 2666 registered users currently using the message boards."
This can only mean one thing: Satan’s back! This is obviously the malefic manifestation of evil incarnate! And I should know - a while back, I got to do an exclusive interview with the prince of darkness (see 07/08/04). But wait - there’s more! Satan’s pitchfork has been found in Dusseldorf! I am only partially comforted by learning that Jesus has been sighted too, in San Diego, California. Although Jesus was able to save a Geo Metro from the clutches of Lucifer, I am fairly certain that Armageddon is upon us. After all, when a new Duran Duran album comes out, can Hüsker Dü be far behind? Remember, umlauts are Satan’s punctuation!
MONTOYA DELENDA EST!
2 Comments:
So, OK, I believe you when you say Jesus saved a Geo Metro...my question is, 'why'???
mom
By
Anonymous, at 1:38 PM
The only explanation my sinful, lowly, undeserving self has to offer you is: because The Lord works in mysterious ways, my child.
By
Helly, at 3:25 PM
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