Alan is so funny when I'm playing video games, providing commentary and back-sass. Maybe you have to know him to get the full mental picture, but here goes anyway. I'm currently playing Bayonetta and in that game, she can destroy pretty much anything when enemies are absent. So suppose she is walking through a park: she can destroy park benches, decorative urns, planters, certain statues and when she destroys objects, these yield halos (like currency in this game) or magical items. I'm hard at work creating a huge swath of destruction and enriching my stores, when Alan walks into the room.

He watches for a bit and then mock-yells at Bayonetta, "Bitch! What do you think you're doing?!? My tax dollars paid for that stuff!", "That's OUR park you're destroying! You better run!", "HEY! I was gonna use that!" and then a bit later, "Hey! I thought I warned you about that!", "Cut that shit out!", "[muttering grumpily] Where's a cop when you need one?!?" and still later, "WHAT?!? I liked that bench, that was a good bench! Oh, you're in so much trouble now!", "Yo! Destruct-O-Bitch! You're gonna have to pay for that, you know!"