So today the advertising sign (which we manage) that's on the side of my building was supposed to be posted with new ad copy. The Boss wanted me to go and check, which I wasn't too eager to do because you might remember that the last time I went to go check on the posting progress of that sign, I came within a yard of being flattened by cars spinning out of control through the intersection. While I was downstairs at the post office boxes fetching the mail, it occurred to me that I could probably walk through - that is, diagonally across - the parking deck and reach the side of the building where the sign hangs without having to walk out and cross two city streets, including the cursed intersection.

I walked through the parking deck to the other corner but because of the topography, I actually ended up on the correct side of the building but one level above the street, though I had entered at street level on the other end. The elevators were behind me, in the corner by the mailboxes, but it never in a million years would have occurred to me to re-traverse the entire parking deck in order to ride the elevator down one level and retrace my steps a third time. I take the stairs in my parking deck (in the adjacent building, part of the same complex) every single day, up and down; I gave it not a single thought as I opened the door and entered the stairwell.

I went down one flight and outside, but instead of directly onto the street like I expected, I was inside this little fenced foyer thing. Not to worry, there were two gates, one opening to each of the streets forming the corner. Er. Oops. Locked gates.

Oh, well. I'd have to go the long way around after all, I thought. So I went back into the stairwell to retrace my steps.

You know where this is going, right?

In this parking deck, utterly unlike in my deck owned by the same people, managed by the same parking company and as I wrote, part of the same complex, the stairwell doors lock on the inside automatically. The doors to the parking garage one floor down (sub-basement level), street level and two floors up were all locked.

I was trapped.

I didn't even have my cell phone because I'd only run down for a moment to get the mail. All I had was my office key and security badge. A flimsy security badge, as it turns out, which did no good at all in jimmying door latches.

Obviously I escaped, because you're reading this blog entry and not a newspaper article three weeks hence titled "Skeletal Remains Found In Stairwell - Preliminary lab results indicate grumpy female". The escape wasn't particularly funny and did not involve the jaws of life being applied to the foyer fence (I'll elaborate if anyone is interested) but what is important is my lament. WHY DO THESE THINGS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO ME?!? Other people can just go to work and do their jobs, but me? I almost get run over, I get locked out of the entire building while running a mundane errand, I spend ridiculous amounts of time trapped in stairwells - stairwells which, it turns out, have NO signs on the doors indicating that they lock from the inside...

Okay, I shan't gripe too much because there are many people with far more difficult lives and far worse problems, but HONESTLY. Who has things like this happen to them?!?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!