I was totally, completely exhausted at the end of last week. Beyond tired...worn out, run down, done in...I felt like the line from a Velvet Underground song: “I am tired, I am weary - I could sleep for a thousand years”. I still felt that way Saturday and as it was obvious that I wasn’t up to doing anything productive, I decided to watch movies all day, after completing the long and arduous journey from my bed to my couch.
First up was Lost in Translation, starring Bill Murray and Scarlett Johansson. I liked it; it was funny enough and interesting enough to keep me watching, but I fail to see what was so fantastically wonderful and poignant about it that it got all those Golden Globes and Oscar nominations. I mean, it was okay, but if I were telling my friends about it, I’d say it was “worth checking out”, not “drop everything you’re doing and go watch this movie” great. That’s just one chick’s opinion, though - here is what the other members of my household thought.
Finnovar: an entertaining little gem which could have benefitted much from a little more character development with regard to “Charlotte”, the character portrayed by the always pleasing Scarlett Johannsen. One fails to perceive much of anything about Charlotte’s motivations and desires, which could have been more fully explored without detriment to the movie. Bill Murray turns in a surprisingly deep, multi-faceted performance. Worth watching.
Sprocket: well this movie was just stupid. It was full of conversations and dumb stuff like that and the only time there was any violence nobody got shot the bullets just went all over, so what a waste. Speaking of waste, I do not see why anybody would bother to cast Scarlett Johansson in a movie and then not show her nekkid. Which we had plenty of chances because they showed her in bed FOUR times but she was not nekkid any of them so it was a total waste of $3.99. Way stupid. Don’t bother.
Next up was Under the Tuscan Sun, which I found surprisingly enjoyable. Romantic comedies are not my favorite genre of choice, to say the least, but it had plenty of humourous moments and kept my interest. Also, I can relate to Diane Lane’s home repair woes; I well remember the time I set out to remove a decorative switchplate so that I could re-wallpaper the back bathroom. Three screws were removed without incident, but when I finally got the last bottom one out and took off the switchplate, the entire light switch assembly fell out of the wall and into my hand. Except it was even worse for me because there was not a beautiful Italian boy nearby to buy me drinks, drive me about in an Alfa and otherwise cheer me up.
Finnovar: not bad for light, not particularly intellectual movie fare. Wonderful cinematography, not hard given the native landscape. Rather clumsy hit-you-over-the-head references to Van Gogh - believe me, we noticed the sunflowers straight away; the huge Thuja tree wasn’t really required. Overall, not a bad way to while away an hour or so on a Saturday, but don’t expect anything profound or moments of ground-breaking cinema achievement.
Sprocket: well this was marginally better than that first piece of crap because at least we got to see Diane Lane almost nekkid in some sexy lingerie. But mostly it was dumb stuff about divorces and journeys of self-discovery and empowerment, which is stupid pointless topics for movies if you ax me. Don’t bother.
Lastly, we watched Cabin Fever, a horror movie about a flesh-eating bacteria which infects some innocent college campers. This movie was badly written, badly acted, either badly directed or badly edited (I couldn’t tell which), maybe it was both - even the obligatory Teen Sex Scene of the Doomed was badly simulated. How do you get a horny teenager to fake sex badly? I didn’t know that was possible. Oh, my...I don’t want to give the impression that I didn’t like this movie. In fact, I enjoyed it the most of the three. See, the only thing I like better than a really good movie is a really bad movie. I laughed until my side hurt. It was great, from beginning (modern-day Deliverance boy on the porch) to end (all-redneck jam session). I liked it so much I watched it twice.
Surly redneck shopkeeper: Boy, you wanna gimme one good reason why you’d steal a Snickers?
Bert the beer-drinkin’ frat boy: Uh...the nougat?
Finnovar: utterly trite. Gory, badly done and without any redeeming qualities. A must-miss.
Sprocket: Well FINALLY! This movie rocked! Nekkid chicks, blood and gore, bloody clumps of gunts coming out of bodies - this was everything a movie ought to be. I have not seen a better flick since Rob Zombie’s great opus, House of 1000 Corpses. Four paws up!
First up was Lost in Translation, starring Bill Murray and Scarlett Johansson. I liked it; it was funny enough and interesting enough to keep me watching, but I fail to see what was so fantastically wonderful and poignant about it that it got all those Golden Globes and Oscar nominations. I mean, it was okay, but if I were telling my friends about it, I’d say it was “worth checking out”, not “drop everything you’re doing and go watch this movie” great. That’s just one chick’s opinion, though - here is what the other members of my household thought.
Finnovar: an entertaining little gem which could have benefitted much from a little more character development with regard to “Charlotte”, the character portrayed by the always pleasing Scarlett Johannsen. One fails to perceive much of anything about Charlotte’s motivations and desires, which could have been more fully explored without detriment to the movie. Bill Murray turns in a surprisingly deep, multi-faceted performance. Worth watching.
Sprocket: well this movie was just stupid. It was full of conversations and dumb stuff like that and the only time there was any violence nobody got shot the bullets just went all over, so what a waste. Speaking of waste, I do not see why anybody would bother to cast Scarlett Johansson in a movie and then not show her nekkid. Which we had plenty of chances because they showed her in bed FOUR times but she was not nekkid any of them so it was a total waste of $3.99. Way stupid. Don’t bother.
Next up was Under the Tuscan Sun, which I found surprisingly enjoyable. Romantic comedies are not my favorite genre of choice, to say the least, but it had plenty of humourous moments and kept my interest. Also, I can relate to Diane Lane’s home repair woes; I well remember the time I set out to remove a decorative switchplate so that I could re-wallpaper the back bathroom. Three screws were removed without incident, but when I finally got the last bottom one out and took off the switchplate, the entire light switch assembly fell out of the wall and into my hand. Except it was even worse for me because there was not a beautiful Italian boy nearby to buy me drinks, drive me about in an Alfa and otherwise cheer me up.
Finnovar: not bad for light, not particularly intellectual movie fare. Wonderful cinematography, not hard given the native landscape. Rather clumsy hit-you-over-the-head references to Van Gogh - believe me, we noticed the sunflowers straight away; the huge Thuja tree wasn’t really required. Overall, not a bad way to while away an hour or so on a Saturday, but don’t expect anything profound or moments of ground-breaking cinema achievement.
Sprocket: well this was marginally better than that first piece of crap because at least we got to see Diane Lane almost nekkid in some sexy lingerie. But mostly it was dumb stuff about divorces and journeys of self-discovery and empowerment, which is stupid pointless topics for movies if you ax me. Don’t bother.
Lastly, we watched Cabin Fever, a horror movie about a flesh-eating bacteria which infects some innocent college campers. This movie was badly written, badly acted, either badly directed or badly edited (I couldn’t tell which), maybe it was both - even the obligatory Teen Sex Scene of the Doomed was badly simulated. How do you get a horny teenager to fake sex badly? I didn’t know that was possible. Oh, my...I don’t want to give the impression that I didn’t like this movie. In fact, I enjoyed it the most of the three. See, the only thing I like better than a really good movie is a really bad movie. I laughed until my side hurt. It was great, from beginning (modern-day Deliverance boy on the porch) to end (all-redneck jam session). I liked it so much I watched it twice.
Surly redneck shopkeeper: Boy, you wanna gimme one good reason why you’d steal a Snickers?
Bert the beer-drinkin’ frat boy: Uh...the nougat?
Finnovar: utterly trite. Gory, badly done and without any redeeming qualities. A must-miss.
Sprocket: Well FINALLY! This movie rocked! Nekkid chicks, blood and gore, bloody clumps of gunts coming out of bodies - this was everything a movie ought to be. I have not seen a better flick since Rob Zombie’s great opus, House of 1000 Corpses. Four paws up!
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