The other day, an extremely large dead deer was lying on the side of the road. It was mostly in the ditch but a bit on the shoulder. He had stiffened with his legs straight up and it was kinda grotesque, which took a macabrely hilarious turn when the county arrived to remove the carcass.
If the demised deer had been lying just over the line in our county, it wouldn't have been that funny because Rockdale County's dead animal removal crew is a couple of dudes in a pickup truck with a large shovel and a chain-saw. (I'm pretty sure.) But this particular large dead deer was over in the next, much more metropolitan county and Alan had the good fortune to actually see their deer-removing crew in action.
They have a giant skill crane. Seriously. There were two guys, one who was operating the huge claw clamped around the stiff deer, and one who was directing him so he didn't bang the carcass into anything while he skill-craned it around to the back of the dump truck. I wonder how one trains for that job - I mean, skillful manipulation must be paramount as one couldn't have any banging around and busting up of carcasses. Carcasses? Carcii? Anyway, it must be cool to work on the DeKalb County animal-removal crew because you get to run the giant skill crane. I'd get fired because I'd always be smacking my underlings with the carcass, probably while screaming, "Pinata! Pinata!" or leaving 'em in the yards of people I don't like.
If the demised deer had been lying just over the line in our county, it wouldn't have been that funny because Rockdale County's dead animal removal crew is a couple of dudes in a pickup truck with a large shovel and a chain-saw. (I'm pretty sure.) But this particular large dead deer was over in the next, much more metropolitan county and Alan had the good fortune to actually see their deer-removing crew in action.
They have a giant skill crane. Seriously. There were two guys, one who was operating the huge claw clamped around the stiff deer, and one who was directing him so he didn't bang the carcass into anything while he skill-craned it around to the back of the dump truck. I wonder how one trains for that job - I mean, skillful manipulation must be paramount as one couldn't have any banging around and busting up of carcasses. Carcasses? Carcii? Anyway, it must be cool to work on the DeKalb County animal-removal crew because you get to run the giant skill crane. I'd get fired because I'd always be smacking my underlings with the carcass, probably while screaming, "Pinata! Pinata!" or leaving 'em in the yards of people I don't like.
2 Comments:
What the deer removal guys had was a grapple truck, a picture of which can be seen here. The two guys seemed to be enjoying their work, hanging out on a nice day, doing a job no one else probably wanted to do, and getting left alone in the process.
Oh, and Helly's not kidding about Rockdale county having two rednecks with a shovel and a chain saw. I've seen them in action. At least, I hope they were from the county, and not just a couple of bubbas out getting some roadkill for dinner. Then again, Conyers does have at least one "Mobile Taxidermist", so you never know.
Speaking of taxidermy, this place is just unfortunately named, if you ask me: "Newborn Taxidermy and Deer Processing". Yes, it's in Newborn, GA, and yes, it's pronounced 'new-burn'. But wow, that just scans wrong when you read it.
By
Alan Bowman, at 8:52 PM
I'm glad ya'll haven't ever had to watch the 'Animal Removal Crew' in Cowshit doing they thang. It's just plain scary. Shovels & large black garbage bags...brrrrr.
Another thing I'm glad Alan hasn't seen: Capes Taxidermy & Sausage
momma
By
Anonymous, at 2:32 PM
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