The Hellhole

Friday, December 06, 2013

One of my BFF's is having An Issue and some associated drama.  For privacy reasons, I shan't elaborate but there's some stuff going down.  We've been emailing and texting throughout the day as the situation develops.  After a few hours of not hearing anything, I text her, "So have anything happened?  Does anything need to be did?*  Have your text been replied to (bitch)? [We always insert a "bitch" to avoid ending a sentence with a preposition.]  Do we have to suit up, go out tonight and kick [redacted] ass?"

She replied, "Nothing yet.  But knowing you stand ready to go with me to kick [redacted] ass is a testament to our longtime friendship based on inappropriateness and shenanigans."

Inappropriateness and Shenanigans.  That pretty well sums me up (bitch).  I have decided that "Inappropriateness and Shenanigans" will be the title of my autobiography, previously planned to be "Glorious Results of a Misspent Youth".  Perhaps I shall even make my own coat of arms, with Inappropriateness and Shenanigans rendered in Latin.  What comes to mind is "Non convenire et stultitia" but college Classics lessons (in which I minored) were a long time ago and I may well come up with a more poetic rendition.  Still:  inappropriateness and shenanigans.  My bud has summed up my life in three words.

* Explanation for bad grammar:  it was on purpose.  Many years ago, my BFF's now-ex husband worked at a car dealership in a managerial role and one day, one of his minions rushed up to him and exclaimed, "Something have HAPPENED, and something has GOT to be DID!"  We use variants of that often.

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