According to Will, all the cool kids (particularly Neil H and Nancy as well as the aforementioned Will) are doing this meme, and who am I not to bandwagon? Especially after admitting publicly that I wasn't sure whether or not "oh snap!" was passe...

MEMOLOGY

TECHNOLOGY
What is your wallpaper on your computer? At home, it is the pretty red race car of Herr Schumacher, because it is a Ferrari laptop (seriously).









At work it is usually this picture of my racing idol, the revered Ayrton Senna, but sometimes if I'm in a silly mood I use this one instead - still Senna, forever and always, but yeah - I rock the video games old skool.

<--- usual










<---- silly (Can you even read this? The white text says "I'm in ur Sega stealin' ur cup!")




How many televisions do you have in your house? Two - one in the den, one in the bedroom. I hope, if we ever get this house sold and get a nicer one, to have a dedicated TV for gaming, like in a media room if we're fortunate enough to have a media room, and a nice flat-screen for our den or TV room.

BIOLOGY
Are you right-handed or left-handed? Nominally right-handed (that's how I write) but it seems more natural to do some things left-handed, so I do - e.g., I use a left-handed hockey stick and hold it with a left-handed grip...although that may be because my first hockey stick, awarded by my brother, happened to be a left-handed stick. Not that I've played any pickup hockey lately, mind you, but as an example.

Have you ever had anything removed from your body? My tonsils, my wisdom teeth, and an enraged gerbil. Okay, I'm kidding about the gerbil.

What is the last heavy item you lifted? Hmm. Probably a box of files when I was archiving some stuff at the office to make more room in my file cabinets.

Have you ever been knocked out? Does this mean like knocked out in a bar brawl by a bottle-wielding hooligan, or surgically? If the former, no; if the latter, three times (tonsils, wisdom teeth and some sort of respiratory/allergy/lung-invasive thing when I was a wee tot).

BULLSHITOLOGY
If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die? I'm unsure about this one. On the one hand, no, I wouldn't so I could enjoy each moment without the looming spectre of my doom terrifying me. On the other, if I knew I only had X amount of time left, I could live each moment to the fullest, do everything I wanted that I keep putting off until "someday" and not worry so much about running a balance on my credit cards. I could be all, "Ha-HA, Visa! Take THAT! Try collecting from me IN HELL!" *cue maniacal laughter* I think I'd want to know if the day were, say, June 13, 2089, but not if it were next month.

If you could change your name, what would you change it to? I'd probably leave it. When I was younger, I hated...not so much having an unusual name, but having an unusual name that was so extremely similar to normal names that were popular among my generation (Kelly, Shelly, Holly, etc.) because nobody ever got it right and it was always a hassle. But I'm used to it now, and I think it suits me.

What colour do you think looks best on you? Green (vibrant and darker greens more so than mint or olive shades).

Have you ever swallowed a non-food item? I'm sure I have - like a bug or a small bit of paper from a drinking straw, that kind of accidental thing happens to everyone, I'd think. Nothing on purpose or on a dare, say coins or live goldfish (or is a live goldfish food, by virtue of being pesce-based?) I ate a piece of a dog biscuit when I was young, because it was blue and I wanted to know how blue food tasted (sawdust and cornmeal), but that's food if you're Sprocket. That's the weirdest thing I can think of in terms of non-human-food, though.

DAREOLOGY
Would you kiss a member of the same sex for $100? Questions like this merely invite other questions. Like, is this a friendly peck, which I'd do for free, or with tongue? Is this a HOT member of the same sex or some disgusting old bat? Is she Colgate- and Dentyne-fresh or does she have the death-breath? I need far more detail before I decide if $100 is fair.

Would you allow one of your little fingers to be cut off for $200,000? No, not unless there was some extremely compelling reason, like a loved one needed a $150,000 operation and there was no other way to procure funds. I kinda like my pinkies. And that loved one who needed the operation better not have pissed me off lately, either, otherwise they can give up their OWN damned pinky.

Would you never blog again for $50,000? I'd probably lie and say I would, take the money and blog under a pseudonym. I'm tricksy that way.

Would you pose naked in a magazine for $250,000? Sure. Anyone foolish enough to pay to see me naked DESERVES to have their money taken.

Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1,000? No - not because it's that bad a dare, but I'm sure I would fail epically and probably hurl on myself, so the effort would be wasted and I wouldn't get the $1,000 anyway.

Would you, without fear of punishment, take a human life for $1,000,000? It totally depends. Really, I'm that much of a moral relativist. If some dude told me over drinks, "Hey, I need you to waste Darlene in Accounting, m'kay?" - oh hells no. But if it was someone truly loathsome, who'd done lots of horrible things, I'd figure humanity would be better without them and I'd certainly be better off with a cool million. It's like John Cusack's character says in Grosse Pointe Blank: "If I show up at your door, chances are you did something to bring me there."

DUMBOLOGY
What is in your left pocket? Nothing. I usually don't have stuff in my pockets. I have either a purse or a backpack, sometimes both.

Is Napoleon Dynamite actually a good movie? No. It is a GREAT movie, total genius. Gimme your tots! I already made like infinity of those at scout camp! I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines! Do the chickens have large talons? LUCKY!

Do you have hardwood or carpet in your house? Yes. Tile in the 2 bathrooms, carpet in the 3 bedrooms, hardwood everywhere else. Our next house will also be carpeted only sparingly, because it has made a HUGE difference in my breathing/allergies/quality of life. I've gone upwards of 3 weeks without an allergy pill since removing most of the carpet, a vast improvement over 1 - 3 prescription pills per day since about elementary school.

Do you sit or stand in the shower? This is kind of a weird question. Do people really sit in the shower? Unless they're ill or something? Well, on the rare occasions that I take a shower, I stand up. Mostly I take bubble baths, and for those I am not just sitting, but semi-recumbent.

How many pairs of flip flops do you own? One, I think - I had a white plastic pair for the pool/beach and another pair (turquoise silk) that my mom got me to go with this beach dress but I'm not sure I still have the white ones...they haven't turned up the last couple of trips to the beach...maybe I threw them out.

LASTOLOGY
Last person who texted you? Alan, my wonderful husband. He was in the dark and curious as to where I'd hidden the light bulbs. He considers 'putting on shelf', 'putting in cabinet', 'storing in closet', 'stacking away neatly' all merely variations of hiding stuff from him.

Last person who called you? My friend/co-worker Tim.

Person you hugged? Do pets count? If so, Finnovar. If not, The Husband.

FAVOURITOLOGY
Number? 7. Double-oh seven.

Season? Summer. I'd like spring or autumn better (more temperate weather) but both of them bring horrible pollen/blooming things/nastiness that wreaks havoc on my respiratory system and makes me miserable despite medication.

Colour? Green. About this shade of green, come to think upon it.

CURRENTOLOGY
Missing someone? You cannot even imagine.

Mood? Moderately amiable. As is typical, my life is a convergence of highs and lows so I generally wind up somewhere in the middle, neither depressed nor euphoric.

Listening to? "Squizz" on XM Radio, generally; Tool's "Aenima", specifically.

Watching? Was watching reruns of "Family Guy" until some stupid sitcom came on, then I switched the TV over to Squizz. We get XM Radio on television, thanks to DirecTV, but it's not videos, just a little blue bar at the bottom that tells you by turns the group, the album and the song they're playing.

Worrying about? The rather large repair bills recently incurred at The Hellhole, selling the house, wishing we could get some of the uncertainties in our lives settled, that sort of thing.

Wearing? Pink and turquoise tie-dye Billabong shorts and a "Made in Ireland" t-shirt.

RANDOMOLOGY
First place you went this morning? Work. At the outlying office 65 miles away, not my usual office. Rising early = grrrr.

What can you not wait to do? Go back to Vegas, eat too much, drink too much, hang with Flippy and Leigh-Ann...

Do you smile often? You know, I'm not sure. I honestly don't know. I don't like the way my smile looks in pictures, too fake, but spontaneously, maybe. ???

Are you a friendly person? I don't know if I come across that way - I find it very difficult to talk to new people, I'm not good at 'small talk', so maybe I seem standoffish or unfriendly, but internally, I'm happy to meet people and hope we'll be friends. In the context of friendly meaning outgoing, no, I'm not, but in the sense of favorably disposed or amicable, I certainly am.