The Hellhole

Sunday, August 26, 2007

I'm in a rut where I want to post but don't have anything major to report. Friday was my brother's birthday, so I sent him a very funny card (kind of a family in-joke), an iTunes gift card and some band swag I made for Valentine Wolfe: bumper stickers and magnets this time. I'm sure they'll give away some V-Wolfe goodies at their show. It may become valuable memorabilia because these are personally hand-made by me and if they get big, stuff like that will be mass-produced.

A week or so ago, we saw The Simpsons movie, which I quite enjoyed - very very funny and exactly what I needed. This may seem like a backward compliment, but what I liked most was that it was simply a longer, wee-bit-naughtier episode of "The Simpsons". No one tried to make it into some sweeping social commentary or vessel for profound statements; the movie didn't pretend to be anything other than what it was: an expanded Simpsons episode. That lack of pretension made it all the more enjoyable. Cameos from Green Day and Tom Hanks were hilarious. Tom: "The U.S. Government has lost its credibility so it's borrowing some of mine." Bwahaha! I can't wait to pick it up on DVD. Any movie where Rod and Todd Flanders pray, albeit accidentally, "Thank you, Lord, for this bountiful penis," TOTALLY belongs in my collection. Spider-pig, spider-pig, does whatever a spider-pig does...

We've also seen Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film For Theaters. I wanted to see that one when it was actually in theatres, but the timing never worked out so I picked up the DVD at Best Buy on release day. I loved this movie! Again, no phony aspirations here, just sometimes gross but always side-splitting humour, disjointed plot turns (to the extent that the movie has a plot) and bizarre characters that make the show fantastically great. Plus Neil Peart and a flaming chicken, and how can you go wrong with Neil Peart AND a flaming chicken?

I knew this movie was destined for greatness during the opening few minutes, when the standard movie snacks are singing a (twisted) version of the "let's all go to the lobby and get ourselves some treats!" song and get interrupted by a speed-metal band featuring drum-playing nachos, an angry pretzel and a mean gum-drop with a lip ring who explains theatre etiquette: "Do not crinkle your food wrappers loudly! Be considerate to others, or I will bite your torso and give you a disease!" Which gets even better: "If I see you videotaping this movie, Satan will rain down your throat with hot acid and dissolve your testicles and turn your guts into snakes! This is copyrighted movie for Time Warner! If I find that you've sold it on eBay, I will break into your house and tear your wife in half!" There's also a box of something in the speed-metal band, candy I guess, but I have not been able to read the box as yet. But really all you need is Neil and the flaming chicken to have a winner.

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