Very high up on the list of things you don't want to hear your husband say to you: "Sweetie, are you hurt? Your butt's bleeding."
AAAAAAAGH!
As it turned out, I had not suffered an alien anal probe or met with some bizarre gerbil accident. My butt wasn't bleeding. Almost always, I sit down by crooking one leg at the knee and sitting on one foot, switching legs when my foot starts to fall asleep. Apparently during my bath, I'd nicked the back of my ankle while shaving my legs, then sat on that foot which got blood on my pajama bottoms. But still - break it to a chick gently next time, mmkay? Because notwithstanding all the weird, gross, disgusting things my body does on a regular basis, I'm still in no way prepared to hear, "Honey, your butt's bleeding."
I'm weak that way.
AAAAAAAGH!
As it turned out, I had not suffered an alien anal probe or met with some bizarre gerbil accident. My butt wasn't bleeding. Almost always, I sit down by crooking one leg at the knee and sitting on one foot, switching legs when my foot starts to fall asleep. Apparently during my bath, I'd nicked the back of my ankle while shaving my legs, then sat on that foot which got blood on my pajama bottoms. But still - break it to a chick gently next time, mmkay? Because notwithstanding all the weird, gross, disgusting things my body does on a regular basis, I'm still in no way prepared to hear, "Honey, your butt's bleeding."
I'm weak that way.
4 Comments:
A likely story.
By
Anonymous, at 3:58 PM
Butt Blood is never a good thing. Glad you're ok.
Sarah, as typed by Bo
By
Anonymous, at 6:30 PM
Yeah, that would be kind of alarming. A bleeding butt is never anything good, unless you're in a butt bleeding contest. But, I've never heard of one of those, have you? (<-- it's 7:54am, I haven't gone to bed yet, which is why I'm extra weird)
By
Anonymous, at 10:54 AM
"Bleeding Butt Contest" would make a great name for a punk band, though.
By
Helly, at 2:44 PM
Post a Comment
<< Home