In a recent e-mail, K'vitsh asked me, "Any weird southern U.S. wedding customs I need to be aware of?" Having spent all my life being American and southern, I'm not sure I'd realize it if a wedding custom was weird. Like much of my weird-ass life, after this long it seems normal to me.
Tell you what wedding "customs" we're not going to do, though: some people evidently find it amusing for the bride and groom, when feeding wedding cake to one another, to smash the cake in each others' faces. I find it remarkably ill-mannered. Ain't happ'nin'. In keeping with tradition, I'm going to wear a lacy garter, but we're skipping the part where Alan sticks his head halfway up my skirt to remove the garter and fling it to the men. No - just no. I'm not sure I'll be doing a bouquet toss, either - not that I find anything wrong with it, but almost everyone I know is either married or in a committed relationship so I'm not sure there will be any available females trying to catch it. We're also not going to do that long litany of specialty dances (us, then our parents, then father/daughter all the way down to "Now let's get all the third cousins twice removed out on the floor!") while our guests sit around and watch. From the moment the music starts, whoever wants to dance can dance, as much or little as they'd like.
We're doing the traditional champagne toast (Alan with sparkling cider) but I don't suppose that counts as weird. What about y'all? What traditions were important and what things did you dispense with? Is there anything you didn't do that you wish you did, or did that you wish you hadn't?
Tell you what wedding "customs" we're not going to do, though: some people evidently find it amusing for the bride and groom, when feeding wedding cake to one another, to smash the cake in each others' faces. I find it remarkably ill-mannered. Ain't happ'nin'. In keeping with tradition, I'm going to wear a lacy garter, but we're skipping the part where Alan sticks his head halfway up my skirt to remove the garter and fling it to the men. No - just no. I'm not sure I'll be doing a bouquet toss, either - not that I find anything wrong with it, but almost everyone I know is either married or in a committed relationship so I'm not sure there will be any available females trying to catch it. We're also not going to do that long litany of specialty dances (us, then our parents, then father/daughter all the way down to "Now let's get all the third cousins twice removed out on the floor!") while our guests sit around and watch. From the moment the music starts, whoever wants to dance can dance, as much or little as they'd like.
We're doing the traditional champagne toast (Alan with sparkling cider) but I don't suppose that counts as weird. What about y'all? What traditions were important and what things did you dispense with? Is there anything you didn't do that you wish you did, or did that you wish you hadn't?
4 Comments:
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!
By
Helly, at 12:58 PM
In mexico they have the bride and groom dance with everyone and they pin money on them. We didn't do that. We are not rentals! We did a thing with candles, I held one, he held another, we lit a third one that sat between us and blew out our own, it was supposed to be the light that would guide us. Don't know what happenned to that candle but it was a nice ceremony and you can just light that candle on anniversaries. Didn't do the throwing of the bouquet or the garter or the traditional waltzing and we didn't have one big cake but a small one for each table that we went and cut for them, together, and served the plates together. It was nice.
By
maria, at 4:19 PM
I really wish I hadn't told my husband it was okay to have sex with hookers at his bachelor party.
By
Anonymous Me, at 9:03 PM
Wait, there were hookers at Mark's bachelor party? I was there, and I don't remember any hookers. Midgets, yes. Hookers, no. Of course, we were all pretty drunk, so maybe there were midget hookers...
By
Anonymous, at 9:36 PM
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