Something strange has happened! I live within the county, not the city limits, so I use a private company for garbage pick-up (which is not the strange part). This arrangement suits me fine, as it means that I pay less per quarter than my friends within the city pay every month. Yesterday as I drove in to work, I was feeling rather smug as I had remembered to drag the trash can out to the curb - I’m not very good at remembering to do this on a weekly basis. I’m about halfway to work when I realize that, for maximum efficacy, I should really have dragged the trash to the curb on the following morning as FRIDAY, not Thursday, is trash day. Here’s the strange part: when I got home from work yesterday, my garbage had been emptied.
You realize, of course, what this means. There is a garbage thief loose in my neighborhood! Someone has been spying on me and has targeted my garbage as being particularly desirable...why? What is there about my garbage that’s so special? It’s mostly empty Diet Coke cans and used kitty litter. The answer is obvious: there are aliens living in my subdivision who need the used kitty litter to power their spaceship back to the home planet. How creepy! I’m pretty sure I know which neighbors it is, too.